: to be afraid of (something or someone)

: to expect or worry about (something bad or unpleasant)

: to be afraid and worried

Have you ever been fearful?  To feel like the rug has been pulled out from under you in such a way that you are paralyzed into inaction?  To have had all of your confidence frozen and your navigational compass spinning out of control?  I have many times in my life and it is a dreadful thing.  To the casual observer it seems silly.  How could I possibly be afraid and aimless?  After all, from all outward signs I am the picture of confidence and joyful serenity.  But there are times that I am consumed by such a force and rendered useless.

Some motivational speakers tout that fear is nothing more than False Evidence Appearing Real.  A silly notion, really.  How can something false freeze a person motionless?

 The great philosopher, John Lennon said,

“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”

I was choosing fear, not love.  It was my choice.  Time to again choose love.

If you have noticed that my posts have been missing, there is a reason why.  I was rolling along, feeling pretty good about myself, my blog, the business of blogging and the hope that blogging would be just what the doctor ordered for the next phase of my life.

That was until my fear got in the way.  I started doubting myself, my abilities, my purpose.  I froze.  The fear convinced me that this was a silly pipe-dream.  The frozen me couldn’t type.  The fear had taken over.

I realized this weekend that like Dorothy I had the magic in me all along.  I am the only one who can change my stars.  I had to find the courage to open my laptop and type.  So I did.  And I will endeavor to continue.

Will fear overtake me again?   If history is an indicator of future events, it probably will.  But I have to believe in myself and my vision of what I want to say and how I want my story to be written.

Please hang with me.  I think we’ll have a lot of fun on this crazy journey together.

So for now, this is me sending love and light your way.

Dana